These past couple of days, I bumped into people I hadn’t seen in months or years — Friends, ex-classmates, ex-colleagues and relatives. After the usual pleasantries of “How have you been?” and “I thought you evaporated the day you deleted your Facebook account!” came the unpleasant usual from ALL of them: “Vivi, you’ve grown thinner!”
I’ve been underweight my entire life. During my teenage years, this almost crumpled my self-esteem. But I learned to accept my body type as I grew older and realized, well, everyone in my family is thin. And with the support of Hubby, I became more and more comfortable with my weight. Until finally, I began to feel beautiful and appreciated being naturally thin.
But still, I couldn’t help feeling a pinch in my heart having “You’ve grown thinner!” continuously echoing in my head the past few nights.
While I learned that we can be as beautiful as we believe and feel, I decided to take a step back. I viewed the numbers on the scale and my own reflection on the mirror from another perspective. Self-confidence is good but I figured I shouldn’t let it blind me. After all, it’s not just a matter of vanity; about my face looking too thin or my twiggy Pinocchio arms. This 90 lbs could be a health drama just waiting to hit prime time.
All these recent encounters reminded me that sometimes we may need to listen to criticisms to put things into perspective. Whether they become destructive or constructive is really up to how we take them.
We can choose to ignore them and move on or listen and reevaluate. But whichever we choose, we should never let criticisms break our spirits.
I am still happy with my body type and I am not expecting to magically turn into a curvaceous bikini poster girl by the end of this year. But I will be watching my own weight more closely and objectively for the next couple of months or until I personally feel that I’ve physically recovered.
This little sack of bones and I have 27 years of challenging relationship and, clearly, still counting. But surely that doesn’t mean I should stop trying to be in a better-looking and tougher piece of sack, does it?
So it’s back to the Nutritionist for me.
What physical criticism gets to you the most and how do you handle the blow?
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